xoxo, nico

i was in a coma until a lifesaver woke me up from this never ending nightmare. he was there all along and in my wildest day dream i always believed a fantasy could turn into something real but i never dared myself to think it could happen to me. i have had the worst luck over these last couple months but i’m not going to let myself blame my personal responsibility on anyone else. if you’re up to the challenge then why don’t you step into my souls and take a little stroll around the block just to see what fun you could possibly run into if you pretend to be me. you can hold my hand while i tip toe barefoot through these puddles until we reach the swingset that takes us to the red hot air balloon when we transfer in order to get all the way up to the moon. i’m on the list with a plus one. there’s a hammock reserved for you and me but the dead bolt won’t open until you fix the lock or i locate the key.

lately i’m beginning to think that no matter what i believe its nothing but an incomplete fantasy. i am normally abnormal and i don’t see things the way he does down on wall street. we are so opposite and the only time we would agree is when we were between the finest egytian cotton sheets. if i could take a piece or each of the celebrities i’ve been with and put them together like a puzzle i’d pick your kisses, his fingertips, the conversation with him, the way he held my hand with the way he had with words, his communication skills, the way you made me laugh until i almost peed my panties, his potential only with his success, how he never made me feel like i owed him a cent but with the way he watched me when i undressed. i never had anything to offer and i never expected anything in return. you can have all you want of me then maybe i can clear your plate then put it away in the cupboard nice and clean. each time i leave i sneak out the window and steal your spare keys.